Chapter Eleven – Closer

Jane drove for quite a distance before she came up for air and realized she had to make a plan. Not only a plan for her day but a plan for her future. Clearly Nathan was never going to be won back, and even if he could have been, Jane did not feel any consuming desire to do so. At the moment she felt nothing but hatred for him; a burning, dirty, coal fired hatred billowing black choking smoke over everything she saw. As she drove she could feel her anger spilling out of the slick sportscar and onto the expressway below. Thick, molten, disgusting hate consuming her. She could not stop it. Everytime she tried to turn her thoughts to something else she came back to Nathan and his betrayal.


As she pulled up to a section of slow moving traffic Jane contemplated just letting go of the steering wheel. Just hammering on the accelerator, closing her eyes, and let the inescapable physics of elastic collisions strip her from this existence. Her hand softly slipped down, relaxing her grip. She closed her eyes and let go, the car barreled towards traffic rapidly closing the distance between her bumper and the wall of unsuspecting vehicles in front of her. She felt like she was flying in a soft slow moving dream. Pulled from the vehicle and soaring far above it, through the clouds and into the sun and it’s warm loving embrace. It felt so peaceful. The tranquility of not caring surrounded her.


“Fuck me!!” she suddenly screamed at the top of her lungs and smashed onto the brake with both feet. Her car, like a confused stallion, squealed and shimmied from side to side and different wheels locked up and then released. A trail of two black skid marks trailed out behind the car like smoke from a parachuting demonstration. “Fuck fuck fuck!!” Jane shouted. The cars in front of her were completely oblivious to her speedy approach and sat unflinching. In a last ditch effort Jane wrenched up the emergency brake and locked the rear wheels. Her car swung softly to the left, then hooked right in a gentle ‘J’ hook. Eventually coming to a stop perpendicular to the rest of traffic. If she had opened her door she would have hit the wall of vehicles beside her. Jane stared forward for a moment. Her heart pounding in her chest fiercely. She slammed her hand down onto the steering wheel and cried.


“You alright?”


A voice appeared beside her and Jane looked to see who it was. A fresh faced college age boy stared back at her. “I–yes. I think so.”


“That was fucking crazy!” he exclaimed laughing. “I was behind you,” he pointed over to Jane’s right and she looked to see a car full of college boys high-fiving and talking excitedly. “did your accelerator lock? I’ve heard of that happening in these?”


Jane turned back to the black haired boy and nodded slowly. “I think that’s what happened–yeah.” Jane lied but what else was she going to do?


“Fuck! That shit was wild!” he laughed, not seeming to care about what could have happened.


Jane laughed despite herself, “Yes. I think I may have peed myself.” she chuckled and shook her head. Looking over the boy’s shoulder she saw that traffic was starting to move. She smiled and pressed on the ignition button but nothing happened. Jane frowned and looked over to her new companion in confusion.


“Man this bitch hates you huh?” he laughed. He waved over to his friends and they quickly surrounded the car. “Take the e-brake off and we’ll push her over to the shoulder.” he commanded.


Jane nodded and did as she was told. She slid the clutch down and pushed it into neutral. Silently the car rolled forward and she smiled to herself. She suddenly felt like a modern day roman empress being transported slowly down the street by half a dozen sweating muscular slave boys. She giggled and turned the wheel, pulling the car over to the side of the road before bringing it to a stop.


“You better come with us then.” the black haired boy said as more of a statement then a question. “Where were you heading?”


“No where actually.” Jane shrugged. She stepped out of the car and stood eye to eye with the young man. She suddenly became aware of how close he was standing. She could smell the sweet musky smell of his sweat. Jane looked him over quickly. His grey tight t-shirt was clinging to his physique showing off the taught muscled chest beneath. His legs were just as muscular and bulged beneath the unassuming pair of sweatpants he had on. There was a name down on side which Jane couldn’t read from the angle she was at but she recognized the pattern as the local university’s college football team name, “Falcons”


Jane snorted to herself and looked back up into the boy’s eyes. At least she tried to. As her gaze had been wandering over his body, he had taken the opportunity to hone in on hers. Despite the age gap he had fixed his view directly on Jane’s breasts. She looked down at herself and smirked, seeing that despite all the danger, and closeness to death or perhaps because of it, her nipples were poking quite prominently into the thin white fabric of her shirt. “Why where are you guys going?” She asked softly.


The boy looked up at her and smirked, “We were just heading to a stripper bar.” he laughed. His brash cocky carefree attitude was disturbingly enticing to Jane, “Teddy’s never been–” he pointed at one of the boys standing next to her car.


“–oh fuck you Randy.” came the response back.


Randy laughed, “So you probably don’t want to come with us.” he smirked.


“It’s a test,” Jane thought to herself. “Why not?” she replied back freezing the head jock in place.


“Well shit why not then!” he laughed. “Alright lets go.” he thrust out his hand to Jane, “I”m Randy.”


Jane looked back at him, “I bet you are.” she muttered under her breath excitedly before replying, “Jane.”


“Nice to meet you Jane,” he bowed his head slightly, “Now lets go get you some drinks and watch some rippers!” he laughed and half jogged towards the large SUV that the group had piled out of earlier.


Jane followed him in suit, admiring the smooth effortless movement of his body. “Delicious.” she thought to herself.


“Boys this is Jane,” Randy said to the crowd once he was settled back into the drivers seat. “Jane, the boys.”


“Hi Jane.” they all chimed back before breaking into laughter and smiles.


A space was opened up in the first bench seat directly in the middle of the crowd of athletic boys. Jane smirked to herself, “Hi boys.” she replied back.


Randy rev’d the engine and tore back onto the expressway merging into the heavy traffic with confidence. “Next stop, rippers!” he exclaimed from the front and the boys shouted back their approval.


Jane just sat and smiled.


“You know I’m kind of surprised you came with us.” It was Teddy this time talking to Jane. He had turned to look back at her from the passenger seat as Randy weaved through traffic.


“Why’s that?” Jane asked innocently.


“Well–” Teddy looked around at the rest of the boys in the vehicle, “I dunno–because–uh–”


“Because this is how a lot of murder mystery movies start?” Jane interrupted quisically.


“Uh–yeah.” Teddy winced.


The rest of the passengers booed and admonished Teddy for even asking the question, “Oh shut up Teddy. What the fuck man.” “Why would you say that?” “What the fuck?” As each boy chimed in.


“It’s also how a lot of pornos start.” Jane offered in return.


“Ohhhhhhhhh!!!!” the group shouted back in stunned surprise.


Jane looked around at them mischievously, “Or at least, that’s what I’ve heard.”


The vehicle was filled with laughter and random shouts of, “I like this one man.” and “She’s a keeper Randy.” Jane joined them in laughing. Admittedly she was exhilarated by their attention. The pulsating hum of hormones and adrenaline coursed between Jane and the rest of the passengers. She didn’t have any fear within her. Instead, she felt very much in control of this situation. She briefly considered inviting all of them back to the house, but the fleeting thought of lecherous desire was quickly chased away by years of rigid conformation to decency.


“We’re almost here boys.” Randy shouted from the front.


Hoots and shouts of approval came in reply.


“Still coming in with us Jane?” Randy asked, turning to look at Jane as he stopped at a red light.


“Fuck yeah.” she said back, “Wouldn’t miss it.” she laughed and more hoots and shouts of approval filled the SUV.


Randy pulled the vehicle up and after a few turns, parked it in a relatively empty parking lot. “Everybody out. Teddy’s got cover since he’s the ripper virgin.” Randy commanded. The boys piled out of the SUV and made their way jumping and hooting towards the entrance while Teddy walked ahead of them, counting his small stack of cash.


Jane followed behind them but was quickly paired up with Randy. He offered his arm to her and she looked up at him and smiled, hooking hers into his. “Shall we?”


Jane nodded, “We shall.”


They followed the rest of the group through the darkened doors of the strip club. Painted on the dark tinted glass was silhouettes of the buxom ladies. One sitting and holding a tray of drinks, while another appeared to have a top hat and was bent over balancing her weight on a cane. Jane smiled to herself as she watched one of the boys spank the silhouette of the bent over woman before continuing through the door.


Once inside the atmosphere was decidedly different from the quiet exterior. Inside the sound system pulsated some rhythmic R&B that was oozing with eroticism. Jane found herself gazing around the crowd of people to glimpse a look at the performer on stage. Randy looked over at her and smiled, “Your first time too isn’t it.” he more stated than asked her.


“Is it obvious?” she smiled.


“Yeah–but it’s cute–so I’ll let it pass.” he winked at her and Jane chuckled. With confidence Randy pulled her through the crowd to an empty table in front of center stage. The rest of the group followed in turn as each boy took his seat.


Teddy, took the place of honor directly in front of the stage. He was looking around the room in wide eyed amazement. He was like a child at his first visit to DisneyWorld. Over stimulated and unable to contain his excitement. He was standing his mouth open as he pointed and stared. Topless women were walking around taking drink orders and everyone was acting like it was normal. “Sit down Teddy, you’re scaring the women.” Randy commanded and Teddy plopped himself down clumsily.


“Would you like anything to drink Jane?” Randy asked politely. It was amusing in this den of debauchery to be spoken to in such a polite manner.


Jane nodded, “I’d like–” she stopped for a moment contemplating what she actually would enjoy instead of what she was expected to drink, “I’d like a bloody Mary.”


Randy motioned to one of the waitresses. A pale highly freckled redhead came strutting towards the table with a confidence that was intoxicating. Her long red hair swung from side to side with the cadence of her steps and her perky naked breasts bounced freely drawing the eye of even the strongest willed man or woman. “Hi y’all.” she greeted the table, “I’m Lacy. What would you gentlemen like to drink?” she asked nonchalantly, her gaze turning to Jane and she winked at her. Jane felt her stomach jump and she smiled back.


“Lacy, the lady will have a bloody Mary,” Randy stated, “the rest of us are going to have a round of Jack Daniels shots.” the table hooted and then returned their attention back to the woman grinding on stage to an R. Kelly throw back.


“Coming right up.” Lacy flashed a bright white smile before turning and strutting away. Jane watched her walk way weaving her way through crowded tables expertly.


Randy leaned over to Jane, “Is she your type?”


Jane looked back at him and frowned, “No–well–I mean.” Jane sighed, “I mean–she’s cute, but no, she’s not my type.”


Randy nodded and smiled, “So who is?”


Jane found herself dumbfounded. She looked into the deep brown eyes of this college boy and shrugged.


Randy looked down at her hand and pointed at her wedding ring, “So he’s not your type?”


Jane looked down at her hand as well and fiddled with the large stoned white gold ring. “Doesn’t seem that way anymore.” She sighed.


Randy put his hand over hers and smiled, “How about you forget about that for now and just have fun.”


Jane looked up into his eyes again and then back down to his hand covering hers. “I think that’s a great idea.” she smiled.


Randy turned towards the stage as the dancer finished her set. He clapped and whistled loudly despite hardly watching her. His companions on the other hand were tossing random bills onto the stage vying for the young woman’s attention. She merely smirked, flicked her hair over her shoulder and sauntered off stage. A moment later a midget dressed in a leather S&M mask and a g-string bolted on stage and picked up all the loose bills before running back behind the curtain, much to the crowds amusement.


“Your bloody mary.”


Jane looked over her shoulder to see Lacy. She was leaning over and placing Jane’s drink. Her naked breast glided over Jane’s arm and she shuddered. “Uh–thank you–Lacy.” She smiled nervously and Lacy just winked again.


“Here’s your shots boys.” she announced in a much louder voice before placing the tray in the middle of the table. Each boy grabbed a glass, held it up and shouted , “Falcons!!” before downing the shots and slamming them back onto the tray.


“Another round please Lacy.” Randy asked. Lacy nodded, and once again made her way through the tables back towards the bar.


On stage the music had changed from the soulful R&B to a classic Pink Floyd tune, “Time.” The introductory instrumental played without any movement on to the stage except for a single spot light that was searching back and forth in time to the music. At the culmination of the drums Richard Wright’s iconic voice bellowed out “Ticking away, the moments that make up a dull day..” and the curtain ripped open to reveal a stunning blonde clad in a latex catsuit complete with a shiny black whip. With arrogance she agressively took the stage and wound the whip up before cracking it. The crowd squealed with delight. She swung herself onto a nearby pole and wound her way up it seemingly effortlessly. She stretched out, reaching for the crowd, then changed position and stuck her legs straight out, then moved into the splits while slowly rotating around the pole. It was utterly stunning. Jane sat and stared.


Every nuance of her movement was elegant and poinant. Jane had never expected to see such artistry on a stage that she would have thought to see gyrations and jiggling lady parts. Instead she saw something more akin to modern dance and ballet. The outfit the blonde had on was perfectly suited to the song and to her motions. She was time emboided. Beautiful, stunning, but ultimately strong willed and destructive. With each crack of the whip she reminded Jane that time was passing, life was slipping away and here she was unfulfilled and empty. She was a vessel of loneliness in need of something or someone capable of creating in her the joy and happiness she thought she deserved.


As the song ended, the blonde walked off stage. The crowd was silent for a moment as if collectively considering what they just watched before erupting into a cacophonous roar of applause, whistling, and hooting. Jane found herself standing and squealing her approval too as she clapped loudly.


Randy turned to look at her, “Now that’s your type isn’t it.” he smiled.


Jane smirked and nodded sheepishly, “That was fucking beautiful.” she admitted wholeheartedly.


“That’s my brother’s ex-wife.” he laughed.


“What??” Jane exclaimed, not sure if she heard him correctly through all the shouting.


“She’s my brother’s ex-wife.” he stated again, “She’s pretty cool. Want to meet her?”


Jane looked at Randy and nodded. “Yeah.”


Randy waved to the bar and Lacy came strutting back, “Yes sugar?”


“Could you tell get Samantha to join us when she’s done changing?”


Lacy smiled, “Samantha?”


Randy rolled his eyes, “Sade.”


“Sure thing, I’ll send Sade out when she’s ready.” Lacy repeated.


Jane looked over at Randy for an explanation. “Sade is her stage name. Waitresses aren’t supposed to let customers know what their real name is, even if they already know who they are.”



“Yeah–I guess it’s supposed to be a safety thing.” He nodded after the redhead, “Lacy’s name isn’t Lazy neither, it’s Jennifer. And that country drawl she’s talking in—totally fake. She’s from Michigan.” he laughed.


“So Samantha, or Sade, she’s ok with you coming to see her like this?”


“Oh for sure.” he nodded. “She’s proud of what she’s doing. She’s the only dancer here that gets that sort of reception even though she’s never naked on stage.”


Jane thought for a moment and realized the truth in his statement. After all, they were in a strip bar where even the waitresses were topless and here was Sade dancing completely clothed.


“You liked it though didn’t you.”


Jane nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah for sure.”


Lacy came back to the table a moment later, “She’s not going to come out today, but if y’all wanna go see her back stage she’ll meet you there instead.”


“Thanks Lacy.” Randy said with a smile.


Lacy smiled and winked before collecting another round of empty shot glasses from the table and walking back to the bar.


“You little shits stay out of trouble. Jane and I are going backstage for a bit.” Randy commanded then stood up, offering his hand to Jane who took it in turn.


Hand in hand Randy led the married woman through the strip bar through the backstage entrance. Jane felt strangely excited by the whole event. Like she was about to go to meet some rockstar. Her heart beat wildly in her chest as she followed Randy.


Once they were through the entrance the music that was blaring was instantly drowned out. It was replaced instead with the titterings of the dancers. There was multiple conversations going on and wanton nudity abounded. None of them seemed to care. They carried on talking to one another regardless of how naked one or the other was. Off in the corner Jane saw one of the dancers applying glittery makeup to the breasts of the other. Through it all the single fully clothed woman came striding out to meet them, “Randy!” she exclaimed. She swung her arms out wide and bear hugged Jane’s escort.


“Hi Sam.” he said softly and kissed her on the cheek. “You were amazing as usual.”


“Oh stop.” she slapped him on the chest playfully and Jane could see in her eyes sincerity in her flirtation. “Who’s your friend?”


“This is Jane.” Randy turned and presented Jane to Samantha, “We found her by the side of the road on our way here.”


Jane held out her hand and Samantha shook it gently, “A damsel in distress no doubt.” she chuckled.


“I just wanted to say that you were fantastic out there.” Jane gushed. “I’ve been to a lot of upscale productions, broadway plays, ballet, opera, and your performance was easily as exquisite as any of theirs.”


“Oh my,” Samantha mockingly swooned, “You sure found yourself a posh little damsel didn’t you.” she laughed.


“I’m serious.” Jane frowned.


“I know hun. I’m just kidding with you. So what made you jump into this lunatic’s vehicle full of college miscreants?”


“Honestly,” Jane looked over at Randy then back to Samantha, “it seemed like the very opposite of what I would normally do.”


Samantha raised her eyebrow questioningly at her, “Oh? Do explain.”


“Well I just–I mean.” Jane sighed and furrowed her brow. “I left the house today and decided I was going to do something out of my comfort zone. Something a good little wife wouldn’t do.”


“Ha! Well you sure did that didn’t you!” Samantha laughed. “You jumped into a car full of college boys and went to strip club. Sounds pretty much exactly the same as me!” she laughed.


Randy nodded smirking. “Well there’s only one thing left to do.”


Samantha nodded. She took Jane by the hand and led her back into the change room. “See you later Randy, I’ll take her from here.”


Randy waved to Jane, “See you.”


“Wait, what’s going on?” Jane asked looking around in confusion.


“What’s going on is you.” she replied cryptically.


“Me? Huh?”


“On stage that is.” Samantha chuckled.


“No—no way I can’t do that!” Jane shuddered. Her heart was once more racing like a hummingbird’s.


“Don’t worry.” Samantha reassured her, “I’ve got a mask for you. No one will ever know it’s you. You can just go on there and do whatever you like. All you need to do is own it and they’ll be putty in your hand.” She held up a metallic looking boyshort panty to Jane’s waist and nodded before handing it to her. She then picked out some shoes, and a shiny bra to match. In addition she handed her a see through mini dress and the coup de grâce, a leather mask similar to the one the midget had on earlier.


Jane fumbled with the articles clumsily and looked up at Samantha for help. “Are you serious?”


“Yes. Very.” she smiled and before Jane could protest she slipped her fingers under the light white fabric of her shirt and pulled it up and over Janes head. “Just trust me. You’ll be fine. These are nice.” she smiled and cupped Jane’s breasts without asking her. Jane shockingly didn’t even protest. “You have perfect nipples, you know that Jane?”




Samantha laughed and tossed Jane’s shirt into her locker. “Do you need help with the pants too?” she teased.


Jane shook her head and relented, peeling her skinny jeans down to her knees, kicking off her heels and leg by leg pulling the tight denim garment from her body.


Samantha nodded approvingly. “Very nice Jane. You’ll do well. Do you dance much?”


Jane shook her head, “Not like you, no.”


“What’s your favorite song?”


“Antonio Vivaldi, the four seasons.” Jane responded quickly.


Samantha stopped folding Jane’s jeans and looked over at her with contempt. “Yeah—that’s bullshit. What’s your favorite song. Your actual favorite song.”


Jane shook her head, “I–I don’t know.”


“Oh for fuck’s sakes.” Samantha stuck her thumbs into Jane’s underwear and tore them down. “Tell me what your favorite song is or you’re going out just like this! Fuck it’s not that hard!”


Jane closed her eyes, “Closer.”




“By Nine Inch Nails.”


“Yeah–I know the song. Well well. That’s something we can work with.” she smiled mischievously. “Get dressed, I’ll get them to cue it up for us.”






Jane got dressed in silence as Samantha walked off. She slithered into the boyshorts, slipped on the bra and pulled on the see through minidress. Lastly she looked at the leather mask. It sat on the bench as if it was disembodied from it’s original owner with the head still inside. It was both beautiful and grotesque simultaneously. Jane sighed, unzipped the back and slipped it on. She looked at herself in the full length mirror attached to Samantha’s locker. It was if she was looking at a completely different person. A stranger to herself. She felt–different. As she stood and admired the outfit Samantha came up behind her. She slipped a collar around Jane’s neck and attached a chain-linked leash to it. Jane didn’t protest in the least. Instead she allowed herself to be led to the stage.


Just as Randy had towed her backstage, Samantha was now towing her onstage. The black thick curtain hung motionlessly in front of her. Samantha was dressed once more in the same latex catsuit as before. Over the speakers she could hear the initial beats of her song. The curtain parted and suddenly she was on stage.


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